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[Jul. 28th, 2004|06:56 pm] |
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My summer is turning out to be so cheap. My parents for some reason refuse to let me out of the house. My dad thinks going out more than once a weak is like, excessive. It's the summer! I should be out everyone night! I'm 16 and in less than two years, I'm going to be graduating and off to some fucking college where I'll get a degree to start some fucking job and end up alone in 40 years with my cats and unhappy, cold nights filled with a Cup of Noodles and cigarettes. And next summer, I'll be taking classes at DVC, and hopefully have a job. The fun never stops. Just because they're living a miserable, boring life stuck in this house for days at a time, why should I? I'm really not a bad kid, THEY SHOULDN'T HAVE A REASON NOT TO TRUST ME! I mean, I'm not on drugs, I don't even like to get drunk that much, sex scares me, and I'm not stupid enough to drive drunk or do something to put me in danger. I swear it's all about control with them. All I want to do is enjoy my youth, hang out with my friends, and explore the world around me. Wow, this is really starting to sound like a pre-mid life melt down, so I'll stop. Brandon is driving me crazy. He's so happy right now,everything is going great in his life, and this sounds awful..but I hate the fact that he's too happy to take notice of my problems. He just blames me for "being rude to him" and being a bitch. I think we're becoming too different. He wants small time, simple things. I'm young and I'm not ready for the small and simple. I want comlications and change. He won't understand though. I barely even know myself at this point in my life, I can't expect someone else to figure me out. But the last thing in the world I would ever want is to hurt him. Breaking up with him is probably something I'll regret later, but right now I just feel like I need the space to expand myself and learn more about different people. That's enough bitching. I hope no one reads this, it doesn't even make sense. If you did just read it, forget you ever did. |
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| Wow..I'd kind of forgot about this thing |
[Jul. 24th, 2004|06:56 pm] |
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Woo-hoo..back to LiveJournal.Not much to say really. I got my license! Yay, clap clap. I'm growing my eyebrows out so I can get them waxed and solve the whole pluck-and-draw time consumer. It was my idea to do this, but now my dad is threatening to ground me if I don't wait to wax until after he gets professional pictures taken of me with my sisters. -rolls eyes-. Everything is going okay between me and Brandon, just our little conflicts here and there. He's such a crazy kid. No offense to him, and no applause to me, but if it weren't for me, he'd be dead. Anyway, my whole summer I've pretty much been scootin around with Kylie and Katie, when I can atleast. I feel like fucking Mary Poppins in this house with these children. I haven't even seen one concernt. But luckily, THE CURE IS PLAYING IN AUGUST! -wets panties- I'm so going. I went to my friend Joelle's party yesterday and got thrown in the pool by complete strangers-blah-. But it's okay, I got ice cream. I want to go to Berkeley soon, I need to do some back-to-school shopping. I've lost like 10 pounds (not on purpose, just eating better and drinking plenty of water and tea:) and now my jeans are awkward. Too-da-loo! |
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| (no subject) |
[Jun. 18th, 2004|08:46 am] |
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Well, it's early in the morning..I'm just relaxing, drinking my Chai, and felt like updating. I don't even have much to say -sigh- My week has been so boring. For some reason, my dad always has an excuse for not letting me go anywhere. Finally I gave in last night and just told Kylie to come over. We sat around and talked for like 3 hours. It was cool, but not as exciting as going out and hanging around. Everytime I even want to go do yoga or something, no..there's always a reason i abosolutely NEED to be home. Oh well, hopefully things will lighten up when i can drive, and I think my mom might be looking in to getting my a car soon. Binka, I'm sorry about all this shit, I can't keep apologizing for my parents, they're just complicated.
Anyhoo, here's my myspace, someone check it out. I'm so proud of all the HTML stuff :)http://www.myspace.com/index.cfm?fuseaction=user.viewProfile&friendID=1944304&Mytoken=20040618084343Just copy and paste that I suppose.
Pretty Kylie
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| Why couldn't I have been a test tube baby? |
[Jun. 13th, 2004|01:07 pm] |
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Yesterday was a bad day. My mom said she was going to drive me out to Antioch to see Biannca since she was going out that way to see Mitra (Mitra is moving into my grandma's house, by the way). So I told her I'd call her around the time she gets off work, which is usually 9 or later. So I called at 8 and she was already on the freeway! She didn't even call to tell me she was leaving or anything, and then she refused to turn back. She also acted like she cared and she was sorry, which annoyed the fuck out of me because I knew she wasn't. I felt so bad because either my dad or my mom have made me blow off my plans with Biannca the last like 3 times I was suppose to hang out with her, even on her birthday! I'm getting so sick of having to revolve my plans around their, and of course..their plans always come first -sigh-. Oh well, that's enough bitching on this subject. Now on to a different subject. Suicide Girls is forcing me to either be a slut or they won't promote me. I got through all the paperwork, age..etc etc..then they ask for the nude photoshoot...um, no. I won't even "creativly" place my hands anywhere. But it's okay I suppose. My friend Matthew is a computer nerd, so he's going to help me set up my own website.
 Me and my guitar, by the way. Just felt like throwing in a picture.
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| Last day of schewl! |
[Jun. 12th, 2004|08:48 am] |
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| |  content | ] |
| [ | Current Music |
| | -"Pinapple"-MSI | ] |
Grrr, Bridget just shut down the computer so now I have to re-type this entire entry -sigh-. Oh, so yesterday was the last day of school! Yay! -parties in her pants- Katie and Kylie asked me to go to Marine World with them a few days before, and I was seriously surprised my dad said yes. Brandon pitched a fit about it though because I was suppose to go to some picnic with him on Friday, but last week he told me that he didn't want to go, so I shouldn't even try asking my parents if I could go. So I was cool with that and made plans to go to Marine World, but as soon as he hears about that he starts saying I "blew him off, again!". I did not, he should have told me to still keep Friday open! He's so confusing sometimes -sigh- Anyway, Marine World was fun. Me and Kylie mainly just farted around while Katie and her boyfriend got all lovey dovey. They're so cute together.We went on all the water rides and got sexy and wet! Hehe. THEN, I seriously ate all the food in the park. I figure, since I actually do eat really healthy all the time, one day of completely pigging out won't hurt me :)I started my day of with Garlic Fries,then went on to 3 churros, then a Funnel Cake, then regular fries, and a bag of Skittles. My tummy was so full, it looked like I was pregant.Hehe. |
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| :I |
[Jun. 7th, 2004|11:52 am] |
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| |  bitchy | ] |
This weekend blew. My dad is being such an ass. He went all out of shape because I was 8 minutes late meeting him at 24 Hour Fitness with my sisters. He says he walked around the mall twice and was about the call the police. I explained the escalator was broken so I had to run to the elevator, and I tried to call..if he was so worried, why didn't he have his cell phone? What a spaz. So he took my cell phone away and I don't know when he's going to give it back. I feel so lost without it :( -cries in longing for her phone- I went to tango last night and had to dance with some cowboy guy and some creepy shoe salesman. Plus the instructor was mean to me, like he doesn't get it's my first time dancing. Sorry everyone, I haven't been doing the tango since I was 4!Aside from that, I had to much homework and crap..what a sucky weekend. Hopefully this weekend will be better, it should since it's the last week of school. Last drivers training on Wednesday, then I can take my driving test! |
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| Blah |
[Jun. 2nd, 2004|12:04 pm] |
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| |  artistic | ] |
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| This weekend is going to blow hot ass. |
[May. 14th, 2004|01:24 pm] |
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| | annoyed | ] |
| [ | Current Music |
| | ...-"Nancy Boy"- Placebo..... | ] |
I have to get one of those stupid mechanical babies over the weekend. It's for my child development class so I just get to walk around looking like some slutty knocked up 16 year old for two days..yay? I dunno, a few of my friends want to drag me around the mall with it or go somewhere, hm..i dunno. Brandon and I have been fighting a lot lately. I'm just not sure what to do about him. It seems like neither of us even try anymore. Well, I'm taking a step I suppose, by trying to work in seeing him on Saturday, but I want to also go to a play Saturday..so everything will be so confusing. Then, on Sunday I'm going this Disney Movie marathon thing at my friend Kristen's house and we're just going to sit around and cry about our lost childhood through Disney films. Keep in mind..I'll have some plastic crying doll strapped to my hip through all of this, erasing my plans of doing anything "fun"...you know. -sigh- Oh well, it's a grade. I'll just deal with it. Maybe I'll even bond with it...ha. |
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| ...Welcoming myself to this fancy new journal.. |
[May. 11th, 2004|11:52 am] |
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| |  drained | ] |
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| | -"Love is Battlefield"- Pat Benatar (sp?) -shrug- | ] |
Ok...well, everyone seemed to be on this livejournal thing, so I figured I would jump on the band-wagon and give it a try. I seriously don't know what I'll put in here, not even I want to take the time to read about the stuff that happens in my life, hehe. OKay so, what's been going on...last weekend I went to the movies with Katie, Kylie and Laura. We saw Van Helsing. It was alright but for almost half the movie I had to go pee but I just couldn't make myself get up, just lazy I suppose. Then I came and had to clean the kitchen until almost midnight. My dad is in chef school right now, so for some reason he thinks that when he cooks I just need to clean up after him all the time -sigh-. I have to go to the doctor today for my physical, so I get to get felt up by my doctor and all that fun stuff. I might have to get a shot, ewwies. Hmmm..I just want to go home and curl up in my nice velvet blankey with my little cow/pig/girl/dog Lucy. She's such a cute little mutt. |
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